Clear Writing

Farm Cottage Dorm Charter*, Fall 2012 
Simeon Farwell-Miller, Clare Riley, Evan Sachs, Mia Bertelli

  1. Students enjoy the sunny common room in the farm cottage.Thou shalt drinketh thy fine tea or coffee as one wakes in the sunshine of the forest. Existeth not in the dark depths of thy cave! (i.e. spend time in the common room.)
  2. Thou shalt watch at least one episode of Doctor Who in good company every fortnight.
  3. If thou art watching weird cooking shows, thou shalt do so in one’s cave because it stresses Mia out.
  4. When feeling solemn, one shalt remember Father Philip.
  5. Thou shalt always feed thy sourdough starter and eat a weekly dose of sauerkraut.
  6. Thou shalt not neglect thy vegetables—save and preserve the vegetables!
  7. Thou shalt cook and eat meals with thy brethren.
  8. Thou shalt spend a sufficient time in laughter with thy brethren (and without).
  9. Thou shalt remember and honor the compost.
  10. Thou shalt turn off the lights (within and without thine abode) if thou art the last one to bed, and turn off lights when not in use in general.
  11. Thou shalt store up the riches of egg cartons and milk containers!
  12. Thou shalt get sufficient sleep and take care of thy health.
  13. Singing Saturdays! Thou shalt sing and dance and do handstands.
  14. Applying soap to cast iron pans is punishable by immersion into the compost.
  15. Spontaneous contact improv is compulsory (for all residents who are not Clare).
  16. Baked goods shall be regularly produced and shared with all cottage residents.
  17. Keep the galley clean!
  18. The spilling of balsamic vinegar is punishable by mandatory push-ups. 
  19. Thou shalt maintain and honor thy dorm charter, and adjust it as good judgment demands.
  20. Thou shalt invite thy friends over for merry gatherings and sushi making parties.
  21. Thou shalt not forget to eat ice cream.
  22. Thou shalt inquire into the well-being of thy brethren.
  23. If the mood striketh thee, thou mayest sweep any floors or clean any surfaces as compels thee.
  24. Put not the pickling spices in thy beans of dill, or they will be wreckethed.
  25. Do as the cheerio box doth instruct: smile!
  26. Inviteth thy friends over for cookies, and share cookies with thy neighbors.
  27. Judge not thy fellow friend who drinketh pickle juice by the glass.
  28. Thou shalt use plenty of butter and garlic.

Dorm Charters are one of the many community-oriented and democratic institutions perpetuated by Marlboro College over the years, perhaps to be adopted by the Marlboro Institute at Emerson College or at the new tenents on Potash Hill, Democracy Builders.